trying to patiently wait..

I long to be a patient person. I want NOTHING more than to be a patient person. It takes practice. I try my best to practice it, but I never ever seem to succeed. I need patience with every single person in my life, or maybe they need it with me, ha! I only wish I was kidding. The Bible tells you over and over to be patient. In tons of scriptures, it clearly says, "BE PATIENT". Why do I have such a hard time with this?

I work in an office where we take 500+ calls a day, not kidding. I lose it with patients sometime. Not that I ever let it show, but I do hit the mute button and vent to the girl beside me. This week I've lost it with these phone people, every day it has been something. It has been change. Change takes time and it definitely takes patience. Now, if you've been reading my blog before, then you know Kensley and I were just hit with a lot of change. So time and patience is definitely what I need right now. Neither of the two, am I good at. I hate waiting, and we've already established that I'm not patient. I can tell this whole practicing thing though is making me better. I realize when I lose my patience and I ask God to forgive me. It breaks my heart when I lose it with the people I care about, it makes me feel ashamed. I am reminded how patient God is with me and it makes me sad to know that I have a long way to go when it comes to this.

Over the past week my character, patience and faith have all been tested. There are times when I've put full trust in God and said to myself, "He's got this" but there have been other times when I've made myself sick over thinking and worrying about it. Pray about your worries, give it to him. I've to remind myself, and I've got to have faith in him and his timing. I've got to learn to wait patiently for his answer and not to be discouraged when it's not what I expected. He will answer with the perfect answer and the perfect time.